It’s a brand New Year and a season of renewal and resolutions for so many people, including me.

At first, that might sound refreshing and full of hope, but the truth is, renewal is only necessary when something needs to die.

For me, this is a time where very little makes sense. I feel like my God is walking me through the funeral of my own understanding.

It all started with the sudden loss of my numerous loved ones and friends over this past year. Next, it was another unexpected major surgery that left me debilitated for over 3 months in recovery.

Often, I compare what is going on in my life to a snow globe. I’m the figurine standing at the bottom of the globe. Then life picked me up off of my stable shelf and started shaking me, releasing all the colorful particles of my life. They taunt me as they swirl past me and bounce off of my skin. I try to hold on to them, but they are moving too fast for me to grasp. They cloud my vision, and I find myself waking up each morning feeling as if I am living someone else’s life.

During these season of upheaval, I’ve learned that I can not trust my own understanding. But I must lean into my source of hope which clears the path for me.

My desire for clarity so often blocks my opportunity to rely on my source. I have been mistakenly focused on trying to make sense of how all the particles will fall on this proverbial path for my life. I’m finding that, as I let go of my need to figure everything out, my trust is being renewed.

We are all uniquely designed like a snow globe, to be shaken. And when we feel ourselves being pulled off of our stable shelf, we don’t have to fear or figure it out. We just need to keep our focus on the One who has us firmly in His hand. Once secure in this trust, we can lean back and watch in wonder as the particles of our lives fall where they may.

A snow globe is the most beautiful right after it has been shaken, and as we learn to die to our need for understanding, so are we.

May this New Year be a year of true renewal in your life, where you allow what is not necessary to die.

Happy New Year.
Cruising the Menowave with you,

Gwen Harris

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